Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Away we go!

Today's appointment was much better than Mondays.

We have two good sized follicles (17.8 and 18.? I forget the . part.) and one mid sized at 15.8 that may go as well and a few small ones. She thinks there are at least 9. It turns out the dr didn't mention those smaller ones on Monday, because they aren't relevant for this cycle but that in an IVF cycle with a higher dose of the injections she was sure that those would have grown as well. Which was something that I didn't ask on Monday and was worried about.

It's so interesting to me that the smaller 13 mm one went to 18 something and the one that was 15 went to 17.8. That's so random.

In addition to the good news follicle # wise, I have a good one on each side, which helps with the fact that I may or may not have a tubal issue.

So we are good to go tonight with a prescription for my last *please, please, please* shot, some good loving tonight (theres no NOT weird way to say that) and an IUI on Friday.

Now fingers crossed that DH doesn't have an issue on Friday morning and fingers crossed that this works.

I fly back east for Thanksgiving vacation on the 20th which is a pain because I will test at home on Friday and then if positive will get bloodwork. The first set I can get Friday and then I will have to find a lab back east to do the second set. Dr said I can wait until I get back, but I will be on progesterone and it will prolong...how did she say it...."a pregnancy that will not work out". GULP. Just the thought of it makes my heart hurt.

I have done a lot of thinking about that possibility and I truly feel that if that's the way this goes down, that I will be done. I know lots of ladies have gone through way more miscarriages and heartache than I have but I think for me that will be it. That will be the limit of what I am willing to go through. I am about 80/20 on that. Is it morbid that this is the way I think, or is it self preservation?

Here we go again ladies.

7 comments:

cgd said...

Wishing you the very best of luck with this cycle. My fingers and toes are crossed and I will be thinking of you on Friday.

Jen said...

My prayers are with you for this cycle. I don't think it is morbid at all...self preservation it is. With what you have been through it is hard not to think about it. It isn't easy to say when "enough is enough", but you have to know your limits. I am facing this myself right now and I am 43 years old.

Misfits said...

It's difficult to not want to over anticipate. You need good thought and I'm sending you the best here. Only you know the limit if your endurance and you've been through more than your fair share already. I liked the balanced eggs here and I have fingers crossed for you to need back east betas (which is in fact the lesser known boy band of 1996).

AmyG said...

Nice follies! Here's hoping for great things this cycle! It's not at all morbid or defeatist to think of the what-ifs. It's the normal grown-up thing to do.

Augusta said...

Wishing so hard that this cycle is the winning one for you at this ridiculous IF lottery. May this one be the one.

Lisa said...

Awesome follies!! I am keeping EVERYTHING crossed for you!

bunny said...

Dear Lord, please let this work. That timing does make things extra stressful! Like the others say, it's up to you to decide when you're done, and you've certainly been through enough to kill a lot of women. I'm just begging and praying that you don't have to come to that point. I'll be sending good thoughts for the next few steps.